When Scandals Become Narratives: Part II

That last post about "grooming gangs" needs a PART II, as there were some points worth nothing that I couldn't squeeze in.

[Original Post: When Scandals Become Narratives - Part I ]

Firstly, this idea that the wives and family members of Muslim groomers are complicit in the crimes. As per the first post, I would again compare it to western men that visit Thai prostitutes. You could well ask, "How could the wife not know he was flying to Thailand?!" and so forth. However, common sense tells you that the wife is usually a victim of the man's behaviour too. As, obviously, the man is hardly likely to just openly tell his wife what he's up to.

People also point out that some Muslim women have thrown labels like "whore" at the girls. Again, this isn't unique to Muslim women, as it's always common for women to make this complaint when a man strays. Blame is assigned to both the man and the other woman/women, and naturally there's a spectrum. With some women assigning more blame to the man and others being more forgiving of their weak, "tempted" husband.

Of course, we're not just talking about straying men here. We're talking about the grooming and sometimes outright rape of underage girls. So in the extreme cases taking the man's side would be unforgivable, even for a loyal wife. Still, there's a spectrum, and once more the Thailand example serves as a good comparison. In both cases there are young, vulnerable girls and women. Some may be of legal age, others not. The guilty men ranging from the occasional user of a prostitute to extreme abusers in the mould of, let's say, Gary Glitter.

Now I can imagine members of the online right clutching their pearls in horror as I make this seemingly prosaic comparison. Nevertheless, it's a more accurate appraisal of the situation than the emotional hysterics they're offering. Plus, trust me, in spite my plain language I find the whole thing just as sickening. In fact, I reach for the Thailand comparison as I find that equally harrowing.

I mentioned in the last post the extreme things that sometimes happen on white council estates. Perhaps a bigger eye-opener for me was when I reached adulthood and started interacting with more middle class people. Where the core problem likewise exists, though in a form more fitting to that particular cultural strata. How comfortable and blasé they often were about prostitution both shocked and depressed me.

I remember once finding out that a guy I played 5-a-side football with went to the far east with his brother once a year specifically for that purpose. The calculated, exploitative nature of the behaviour, from a seemingly normal person in my social circle, filled me with a sense of grim dread back then. What was perhaps even more disturbing to me was the cold indifference of the other men when it was mentioned. At best a shrug of, "So what?", more often the question, "What's wrong with it? They're getting paid."

And that one example isn't an isolated incident. I know friends of friends that are teachers and lawyers, that have travelled abroad to behave like this.

Consequently, I've had countless arguments. Always being greeted with that classic line that it's no different to any other paying job.

"Women don't enjoy working in McDonald's, but you're happy to pay them to serve you fries. What's the difference?" they'll ask.

My response is always the same,

"Okay, give me your mother's phone number. I'll offer her a job at McDonald's, then I'll offer her a job.. dot, dot, dot. Then tell me it's the same."

It's a little harder to keep up the false charade when it's your own mother or sister getting the employment opportunity. I always put it in deliberately crude language too - that I'm bleeping out for the sake of taste here - to drill home that effect. In contrast to how they dress the act up under 'sex work' and other such labels to obscure the raw meaning.

Either way, I always look at these people and think, "Wow, if my daughter/sister/mother was destitute you really would just happily exploit her for sex if you thought you could get away with it. You're not like me, are you? Though you appear the same on the outside."

And this is the thread that runs through all these things. From the Muslim grooming gangs to the western sex tourist. That cold snake-like mindset (I used "crocodile-like" in the last piece - either way, reptile vibes), where there's simply no thought or care for the people being offered up. Particularly if they're foreign or unrelated. No sense of honour. Just a greedy, and sometimes deeply perverse, desire to indulge.

I don't know how we deal with this mindset. Perhaps it's the way we've raised these people? Perhaps it's innate? I don't know. Maybe the answer is indeed hanging, but if it is we're going to need a lot of rope. As it's not just Muslim necks.

That's a bit of a grim note to make. I didn't mean it to get so dark. Personally I'd like to believe the answer is nurture. As much as I have disdain for the men that behave this way I certainly wouldn't hold a single trip to a Thai brothel against someone if they showed sincere remorse. We all make mistakes. We all have weaknesses. We can all be cold and thoughtless at times.

This brings me to another addendum I wanted to note (hopefully a tad lighter). In the anecdote I shared last time I forgot to mention how left wing I was back then. As a student in my early twenties I obviously had quite a different political outlook. Still, in spite of that, I instinctively felt an, almost tribal, sense of, "They're taking one of our women." It's an interesting thing to witness in yourself, and it gave me a bit of cognitive dissonance at the time. My worldview should've precluded such a feeling, yet still I felt it.

I don't necessarily think it's good or bad to have such 'tribal' feelings. It's just natural. It's probably best to acknowledge it though, rather than pretend it doesn't exist.

Also, another addendum on a slightly different topic (before this gets too long). That lack of acknowledgement of just how bad the north of England was in the 1980s and 90s doesn't just lead to a misunderstanding of this issue. It also warps perceptions when it comes to crime statistics in general. People will complain about the degradation they see with their own eyes, but then someone like Fraser Nelson will come along, point at a graph, and say, "Ah, but actually, violent crime has reduced."

Yet this is sort of comparing apples and oranges. We used to have things like football hooliganism, 'twoked' cars, and white council estate violence. Now we have roadman stabbings and phone theft. People are complaining, quite justifiably, about the latter, but they're told it doesn't exist (or at least, that it doesn't exist to the extent they think it does), because football hooliganism and other essentially unrelated crimes have decreased.

The online right play into this sense as they portray Britain before mass immigration as some type of white Eden. Essentially forgetting or eradicating the Britain I grew up in just thirty odd years ago. So much so that I now have to write it down in recollections like this.

Anyway, that was quite meandering, but it's my two cents. Twenty cents when taken with the original post.